Small Talk Sucks

What’s good internet? What’s really good?

So, I knew for sure that I was an introvert, when I realized how much I don’t like small talk. It definitely feels pointless. Pointless for me especially has to be the “How was your day?” questions. Why? Because you’re probably gonna get the same response out of me 95 percent of the time that you ask.

People: “How was school?” or “How was work?” or “How was so-and-so?”

Me: “Fine.”

Me (Inner Voice): “It was like any other day.”

Or the random upbringings about the weather:

People: “It’s pretty hot today, huh?”

Me: “Yeah I know, right.”

Me (Inner Voice): “My full body layer of sweat already told me that shit.”

Or the dreaded “What do you do?”:

People: “So, what do you do.”

Me: “I’m a student.”

Me (Inner Voice): “I’m a professional crowd avoider and I occasionally like to talk shit about everything.”

I think you get where this is going. The conversations just feel so one-dimensional. Plus, I have to fight the urge from my inner voice telling me to be a complete smart-ass.

It’s not that I don’t like talking…okay, sometimes I really don’t like talking, but I just don’t like talking about things that are too trivial or too repetitive. I don’t like that feeling where I have to give a progress report of my day every time I see you in public. Unless I was hit by a car or something, not much has changed in the past 24 hours since I last saw you. I wanna save my vocal chords for subjects that I deem worthy. I really don’t give a damn about what you had for lunch today.

You heard the Tumblr picture

But for real though, it’s hard to find stuff that’s interesting to talk about sometimes, and the conversations usually end up at one of two extremes: I’m either ready to leave or I can’t shut up. If the latter happens, that’s small talk done right to me. As soon as something clicks in the conversation, it’s a thing of absolute beauty. Those are the conversations I love the most, and I hope more of those come my way. Until then, I guess I’ll just continue expressing my frustrations (and saying all of those things I didn’t say before) via my keyboard.


I’m done. It’s getting late, and it’s too damn hot in this tiny ass apartment. Don’t talk to me about your oh-so-wonderful-day. Alright, peace.

Follow me here on WP for more stories/rants/poems/etc. Follow my art gallery on Instagram @cyberart_by_justin too. I’d appreciate it. Thanks!

Joe Johnson

P.S. And in case you want topic ideas for me? Art, comedy, all the creative stuff…and track and field too. I don’t know. I try to be as open as I can. I’m not just gonna immediately say, “get the fuck outta here” or nothing rude like that. I try to be somewhat respectful…and then indirectly explain my frustrations on here. Okay, I’m gone for real now. Bye.


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